Stripper Robot

Stripper Bots

Plain and simple, WHAT THE FUCK. Okay, so I’m all for creating robots. Kind of. One day they will take us over and we’ll totally regret it, but the idea of having the perfect clean up robot for those “Woops I really shouldn’t have killed him but now I need to dispose of a body” moments… hell yeah. Your best friend is supposed to help you with these things, but a human has these things called “feelings” and “remorse”. Crime Scene Clean-up Robot gets the job done without asking the questions. I’m getting way ahead of myself here. Instead of people focusing on creating clean up robots, and things of the like they have created this : SCARY STRIPPER BOT. I can only imagine how far this will be taken in the next few years. Not only is it a creepy concept in general they had to throw on whatever THAT face is and lingerie that looks like it was pulled from the set of Austin Powers.

Granted, there’s not much difference here from a day time stripper, you know the ones. The same dead look in their eyes and lack of “feelings”. When examining the video you’ll even notice they must have programmed the moves from the last shift of an older woman who goes by “Misty” maybe. Shouldn’t we think of them? You start creating these Stripper Bots and poor Misty will be out of job. Imagine, a strip club full of Stripper Bots. In my world I imagine these specific Stripper Bots with grotesque faces and well placed fake breasts and vaginas. I’m not sure why, I think I like to torture myself though and that’s another story. There’s also this version, slightly more palatable. German engineers even created a DJ Bot to go along with this amount of Crazy.

I’m not sure why they focus so much time and money into these ideas. I’m really waiting for my ideal clean-up robot. One like in the Jetsons. So we can all be even lazier, and one day it’ll “catch feelings” somehow, and kill us in our sleep for leaving our dirty socks directly outside of the hamper- one half in. If I was a clean-up robot I’d kill for that reason, and then I would have my Crime Scene Clean-up Bot to help me destroy evidence. Duh. I suppose I do understand the appeal of this for certain reasons. Either you are of technosexuality or ASFRians and into that seemingly weird robot sex, or you are just thoroughly amused by stripper robots… or maybe you’re one of those people that can’t hold a conversation with anyone in general and have to surround yourself with robots to feel loved. i’m sure there’s a million reasons these stripper robots exist and i’m not sure if I want to find out all of the reasons today or not. For now, i’m content with living in my waking nightmare of Scary Stripper Bot with witch face and old lady lingerie. Thanks.

By Keycifer Blakk

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