Oh Las Vegas how do I love thee? Shitty theme hotels as far as the eye can see. Tourists cut from every type of cloth you can imagine. But alas, we were not there strictly to have a good time. This was work, God damn it! We’re doing another round of the Las Vegas tradeshow circuit again (MAGIC, POOL, AGENDA, CAPSULE, WWD, blah, blah, blah). Four days and literally miles of fashion mayhem lain before our feet. I wish I knew the secret of staying out all night and still managing to make it to work on time but it just doesn’t happen. And you just can’t look your best when you’re all hung over… I mean, I guess you could but I require a lot more maintenance than that.
So, here are a few tips I’ve picked up along the way.
- Day Drink. You’ll pass out early and get more sleep. Ergo, you’re less hungover. It’s easy to do. There are bars all over the place at these things. One the first morning we were met with mimosas at the front door. SWEET. When you stroll through the higher end vendors they almost always have champagne. Some vodka company or another sponsors a free happy hour on any given day and if that isn’t enough, it never takes too long to find a cash bar. A lot of people just keep a cooler of booze. Sit down at the table, have a drink & place an order.
- Always book a smoking room. I know it sounds crazy given that cigarettes will stink up just about everything. But that’s the thing. See, nobody wants to get popped by the cops in a strange land, so smoking a joint on the strip probably isn’t the smartest thing to do. If the room already reeks of cigarette smoke, nobody is going to smell the Sour Diesel you managed to get safely past the TSA.
- Micheladas are the perfect cure if you’ve had too much the night before. Just enough of the hair of the dog. Smoke your last joint & get your shit packed. Head out for a couple of eggs, some tortilla and you’re all set.
- Make sure your return flight doesn’t take off until after 5:00 PM. Seriously. If you think you’re going to get to bed early and not wake up feeling like stepped on gum you’re just dumb. Give yourself time to recover before you have to get sardined into the shitty coach seats you booked for the ride home.
The fact that I felt the need to provide this list is probably a good indication of how our buying trip went this time around. I guess you’ll have to check back to see what we actually bought.